Monday, December 21, 2020

Not Mine, but Not Easy to Find...

This is an SCA thing, and I am not an SCA member, but ever since Odin's Gift went down, I couldn't find this anywhere. It's closer to Marvel than actual Norse Myth,but googling it I couldn't even find it with the author attributed. I think I might have added the A on Hel's name to distinguish from Hell for any Christian readers, but this is otherwise as written. If there's some SCA place I can just link here, let me know. 


A Viking Christmas Carol
 

\original lyrics Clement Clarke Moore (1779-1863)



'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Hall


Not a creature was stirring, not warrior nor thrall.
 

And I in my armor, my shield and my helm
 

Was drunker than anyone else in the Realm.



I staggered upstairs and fell into bed
 

While four quarts of mead were ablaze in my head.
 

Then up from below came the sounds of a brawl
 

So I grabbed up my axe and ran down to the Hall.


 

I missed the last step and crashed down in a heap

Thinking, "Why can't those low-lifes downstairs go to sleep!"
 

When what to my wondering eyes should appear
 

But two brawny strangers, wielding mallet and spear.



I said to myself, "We'll soon have them beat!"
 

Then I noticed ten warriors laid out at their feet.
 

I gave out a yell and leapt into the fray...
 

I'll always regret my poor choice of that day.



For the one laid his hammer to the side of my nose
 

And up, up, up to the rafters I rose.
 

Then came a lone frightened voice from the floor,
 

"Those are no mortal warriors -- that's Odin and Thor!"


 

Then they looked at each other and they said, "Battle's done.
 

Now they know who we are, it no longer is fun."
 

Then Thor raised his hammer, and his elbow he bent,
 

And with a loud crash, through the ceiling they went.


 

I crawled through the Hall and flung open the door,
 

 Not really sure that I'd seen them before.
 

The snow bathed in starlight, the moon like a glede,
I

 saw them ride off on an eight-legged steed.


 

And I heard them exclaim, 'ere they flew out of sight,
"

TO HELA WITH CHRISTMAS, WE JUST LOVE A GOOD FIGHT!"

© Guy L Bradley aka Sir Cipriano d'Alvarez, SCA



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